Friday, August 26, 2016

One More Day... Wedding Bound

So excited that the weekend is here! I must say this week flew by and I couldn't be more relieved that things are starting to fall into place as the day is closer to my friend's wedding. I will get to share my hotel room with another gal and that's good because we'll get to split the costs. I just hope she doesn't snore! I'm a light sleeper and my ears are always on so crossing my fingers.

I have yet to buy my dress (waiting on payday which is today but my check is in the mail), so I'm hoping I can take care of that if not today, definitely tomorrow before I head out to Galveston. I did get a tip from a friend to go to Ross because they have the blush, lace dress I've been wanting.

For sure getting my nails done later today. They are looking so rough they've been barking. This is the longest I've gone without getting my nails done so I will feel better once that's done.

Yesterday I took a 6 hour nap and so I ended up going to bed for an hour or so and then had to get ready for work. One more week of waking up at 5ish and my new schedule will start soon where I don't have to go in until 10am.

I haven't even packed my bags so I'm going to work on that tonight and get a good night's sleep.

I can't believe in 24 hours I get to see my good long time friend Melissa tie the knot. I've known her for over 10 years and even though we've always been long distance friends, she's someone I know I will have in my life forever. She's the older sister I never had and I'm so over the moon happy for her.

That quote above is by Oscar Wilde. It is so true and I'm glad she found someone who sings her that song.

BTW, I blogged 5 times this week! Holy macro! That's a record. {If you missed my previous posts, just look on the Blog Archive to the right.}

I hope everyone has an AMAZING weekend! Send me good vibes on my solo roadtrip and it is time to be wedding bound :)

Thursday, August 25, 2016

A Special Wink

Life sometimes can have those coincidences or synchronicity taking place that makes you feel the universe is sending you a wink. Sometimes it could be circumstantial or just the law of attraction sending you a sign. The times I've come across an event like this would be when I'm thinking of someone I haven't spoken to in a long time and then suddenly I hear from them the same or next day.

It can also happen if I meet someone that I needed to help me overcome an obstacle I was facing and they came at just the right time. Or it can be when I needed reassurance when I was feeling emotionally low.

That's where this Dr. Pepper bottle comes in. Just something you should know about me, I am obsessed with Dr. Pepper. But anyway...

Yesterday at lunch, my coworkers and I were talking at the lunch table and one of them tells me that she thinks I should drive to San Antonio and meet The Marine. This way I know in person if there's something really there. As soon as she said it, she pointed out to me to look at my Dr. Pepper bottle. I looked and saw this wedding gown design on it.

That literally sent chills down my spine. It can mean many things, but what I took from it is is that the universe or God or whatever was letting me know that there's hope. One day I will be a bride. As to who the groom will be, yo no se. I will also say that I am also headed to this wedding in Galveston so that could have some meaning too.

I just thought it was interesting how she noticed it right after she was done talking about The Marine. Keep in mind the other Dr. Pepper bottles coming out of the machine did not have that same design either. What's also funny is that I wrote in my journal the night before for God to give me a sign of where this needs to go because everything is up in the air.

Do any of you pay any attention to Astrology? I do and I'll say that I'm a Scorpio and The Marine is a Leo. There's many readings out there that say this sign match can make it, but they will have obstacles. So even though I know what I deserve, my heart is still conflicted because we haven't had the opportunity to meet. It takes two to tango or what have you, so maybe that's what needs to happen soon.

Who wants to go to San Antonio with me? I'll drive.

In all seriousness though, if I go it might be in the next few weeks. Us Scorpios are go getters and we like to get to the bottom of things and never leave a stone unturned.

It also doesn't help that he called me yesterday telling me how much he really misses me. He sounded so sincere in his voice and sad like I could feel the emptiness I left him with. At this point, the ball is in his court that I need actions and I'm done with sweet words.

Has this synchronicity business ever happened to you? If not, just make sure to keep your eyes open. If so, what happened? I am fascinated with this phenomenon.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Why Writing Your Heart Out is Key

Happy humpday loves! Recently I started a journal and yesterday it came in handy for a few reasons. Before I dive in, I want to share how having a blog is great, but sometimes you need an even more of a {private} outlet to let it all out. It's extremely helpful especially if you are needing to organize your thoughts in your head and at the same time not have any filter, just BLAH, spit it out. No judgments, no qualms about it, just you, raw.

I was a little surprised how much it helped me because as you may have read, The Marine, didn't work out. While writing out my frustrations, I was surprised to find how liberated I felt afterwards. I even tried talking about it with my mom and that wasn't helpful at all because she's coming from a logical perspective.

Aside from that though, the process of writing in my journal came through for me in a way that I didn't know it could. I used to journal when I was younger, but I guess I stopped. I would eventually get back into it, only to drop it again. This time I really want to stick to it and my goal is to write in it every day. Who knows, maybe it will help me with blog ideas that I didn't even know I had brewing.

With everything that's been going on, it's helped me to release my thoughts and at the same time the stress those thoughts heavily weighed upon me. I read an article from this new blogger who shared the benefits of writing in a journal so I wanted to share that with y'all {here}. There are other wonderful blogs out there who also touch on similar keypoints, but it's late and ain't nobody got time for dat. Maybe I'll come back later and put them back in this post.

For now, I'm trying to be strong and even though there are tons of dating profiles that can land (and have trickled in) in my inbox, I'm just not interested. I'm hoping that this trip to Galveston will allow me to clear my head and give me a jolt to snap me back to my old Bella self {pre-The Marine}.

I wanted to also add that after I wrote all my thoughts down, I was amazed at what my inner self was telling me that I didn't even realize I was thinking. It's almost as if the stars aligned and showed me a side of myself that I wasn't aware of. Pretty fucking cool if you ask me.

It seriously feels like I'm cheating on my blog, but I see my journal as my blog's fraternal twin, or my blog's sidekick to keep me in check. In the future, I will share snippets of what I write, but don't expect drawings or cute doodles because that's not my forté. I'm just a writer.

I leave you with this kick ass quote, which inspired me to put on the lovely graphic above.

Do you journal? If so, how has it helped you if at all?

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

If It Talks Like a Duck, Walks Like a Duck, It's a Damn Duck

Feeling pretty sour right now and deep down I knew better. Having hope while dating someone is almost as if it was love that can make you blind. Despite the mounting evidence and inconsistencies, you tell yourself this person deserves another try. Well I reached the expiration date of fucks to give.

As I said in my post last week, The Marine was being sketchy. He would say he was going to try to come for his birthday weekend and he didn't. I gave him a chance thinking that he'll make it up by going with me to the wedding. Yesterday he tells me that he has to work and that didn't surprise me because he would avoid the topic when I would bring it up.

I pressed him yesterday because my BFF who's getting married needed a head count. He finally told me the truth that he has to work. What I don't get is, if he knew he had to work then why didn't he tell me that? This is the lack of communication I was griping about last week.

So I asked him if we can Skype or if he can send me a video. I have this suspicion that he's hiding something and I don't like that unsettling feeling. He said no and instead of being understanding and oblige, he made up a lie that he wasn't who he said he was. My heart was racing because maybe he was catfishing me after all.

He sends me a picture of some other guy who he claimed was him. Then the little watermark at the bottom of the picture said an URL for a "quick meme" site. I knew he was joking and it made me mad. How can he joke about something like that? It made me feel like he doesn't take my feelings seriously or tries to understand where I'm coming from.

This is all just a huge joke to him.

It makes me sad to realize that the guy I was interested in, turned out to be someone who is insensitive to others' feelings and concerns. Basically tries to make fun of my feelings, which are valid. Tell me that if the situation was reversed, he wouldn't ask for proof. In this day and age of online dating, we need proof. If you can't meet in person then FaceTime or Skype. Make an effort to show the other person that you're not pulling their chain. Last but not least, don't play a joke to make them feel silly for having fears they were being duped like any other human being would.

I am human and I am not going to apologize for it. In the end, he's the one who's wrong for acting this way.

Regardless of this ordeal, I am still looking forward to Galveston because I'm there to celebrate an important person in my life and hey, at least I'll get to go on a mini roadtrip and enjoy myself, solo.

Monday, August 22, 2016

Counting Down the Days...

Happy Monday loves! My weekend was pretty mellow since I hardly left the house. Let's just say Netflix was my companion and it certainly delivered. I watched Stranger Things (anyone seen it? it's so good!), finished Total Divas (can't wait until Total Bellas debuts in October), this weird movie called The Invitation, (it's a psychological thriller, so intense my heart was still beating hard after it ended) if you watch it let me know what you thought.

I watched Power and the ending nearly killed me from heartbreak. I hate when couples breakup! I cried with the characters... *insert eyeroll here*. It's crazy how TV characters take you back to a time when you felt the exact same way. I wanted to throw something at the TV, that's how mad I was.

On a happier note, I booked my hotel for Galveston and I'm glad this hotel is close to the wedding ceremony and pretty affordable. I can't believe in 5 days I'll be well on my way to Galveston, even though I'm driving solo it's going to come in handy listening to my free satellite radio and throw some new Frank Ocean in the mix. I can't wait to see my BFF get married and get to meet The Marine.

Since I'm a bit of a control freak, I already hinted to him how he should look. Button down with slacks, or a blazer with no tie and slacks, trimmed beard. I held back from hinting at colors so that we match, gotta hold on to my crazy a little while longer.

As for me, I need to get my nails done as well as get a new dress. Most of my dresses are in storage so I have a valid reason, plus my storage is all the way in Plano (which is a 45 min drive). I'm hoping I'll find a blush knee high dress, if it's simple that's fine but ideally I want it to have lace.

Regardless of how we look, we're gonna have a grand time. It's been a long time since I attended a wedding with someone I'm interested in. The past few weddings I've gone by myself or with a girlfriend. There's nothing wrong with that, but this is just different in a good way.

Even though I was a bed potato (watched TV in my bed) all weekend, I was only getting recharged for the last week of training at work and the incredible road trip ahead. Countdown begins.

PS. I blogged this weekend, so if you missed it here's how The Marine and I are back on. Click on the pic below.